All Hail the Fire Lady!

She’s the occasional kidnapper, occasional heroine, but more than often always fiery – It’s the Fire Lady of Farfadel!

Why yes, her magnificence has now graced the page in … watercolor? What an odd medium for her!

All joking aside, I’m super pleased with how this painting came out. The Fire Lady is one of my most beloved characters in Farfadel (I would get messages from reader friends like “IT’S THE FIRE LADY!” when they finally met her in the pages), and I feel like I managed to capture her changeling personality in this piece. It may not be perfect, there are certainly technical errors in it, but I am allowing myself to be pleased!

But who is the Fire Lady? As I said, occasional kidnapper, occasional heroine. A friend of mine suggested ‘chaotic neutral’ and I find that suits her perfectly!

In a more technical sense, the Fire Lady is the youngest of the Great Ladies at the time of the ‘Tale of Two Queens’ and the ‘Tale of Adelaide and Shadow’. She was an apprentice to the Great Lady of the Mountains, but caused sufficient havoc to become her own Ladyship. How exactly she gained that title is still disputed, and has yet to be written.

So that means there is much mystery to her still! How did she romance her beloved Oracle? Why is she always fighting with the Fairy chief? And why oh why does she not hand out magical goats any more?

So much mystery! So much left to discover! And I am SO pleased to say that I am working on a trilogy of Farfadelian shenanigans with her -> her eminence the Fire Lady <- at the center of it. She isn’t the main character, but her character arc fuels the plotline like a gasoline trail. But maybe one day I shall write a tale with her as the main character! That would certainly be fun. Maybe a whirlwind romance, a tale that is tugging at my mind lately…

Anyways, I will return to painting portraits of my characters. I wish you all the best! Fellow writers: do you have any chaotic characters? Do your readers like them? Do you?

Quick Hello Again!

Hi everyone! I’ve missed you all ❤

I can’t say I’ve missed this blog though. I feel it became a toxic ranting space for me, and I don’t want to contribute to that kind of atmosphere. So! I’m thinking of rehashing this space. I think I want a nice space for my writing dilemmas and ideas, with the occasional mental health update. I guess I want to still give you all a glimpse at what it’s like ‘behind the scenes’ as well as somewhere to talk with people about my writerly life.

So, on that note, how have things been going with me?

Things have been going well, darlings. As some of you may have noticed, I’ve been very active with my birdies and getting a grip on managing them and their many projects. That was, for a while, my most engrossing project. But lately, I’ve been finding my feet with Farfadel and other novels as well. My mental health has been very up and down, but in a general upwards streak.

Lately, as in the past month or so, building up until the past week, I’ve been having Kuryo and Chaos’ story stuck in my head. So! I decided this week to bite the bullet and start re-editing that messy blurb.

In my head, it was an impossible task! How could stories inspired by dreams be anything but a chaotic mess?

But, after re-reading the first three books, those in Kuryo’s series, I’m shocked. They’re not that bad, for real! They’re pretty cohesive, and the last one is the one that is the most messy, but it’s not unfixable. It’s hardly as bad as I thought it was!

One major thing I want to rework is an ending for one of the villains of part 1: Kay.

Now I’m not going to tell you who he is (that would be spoilers!) but I am going to say I’m thinking of having him team up with Bella later on in the series. That would be such a pain in the ass for Kuryo and Chaos! He also is the absolute opposite of Bella, so they would make quite a team. Whereas Bella is more of a hysterical squirrel with rabies, I think of Kay as more calculated and professional. Like an angry ice cube!

On another note, I got my quasi-ancient scanner to pick up on my watercolor paintings, so here is a painting I did yesterday of Kay. You can maybe guess who he is by the picture 😛

Finally, I’m going to blow some time rehashing this blog. I want to redesign it and make it all pretty and writing-focused. So hopefully that means lots more artworks, and writing-focused sections! Let me know who you think Kay is in the comments! And do tell me how you’ve been doing!

I wish you all the best ❤

Yeah! So Excited!

Wow! I’m so excited for Lage’s Game! Y’all, I had no idea that the little bit of story I had in my mind would take so long to lay out, but here we are. I’m immensely pleased with the tone of the story and how it ‘feels’, at least when I read it. I like the suspense, the way it’s laying itself out.

Circlet School is somewhat stumping me right now. I feel a little uninspired for it, and am not sure why. I just feel like I have nothing to write about it, like I’m in a lull or ’empty spot’ in the story. Which is ridiculous, as the students are about to arrive and we all know that’s going to mean more shenanigans.

Also, Ramadan is over. Which makes me sad. I felt ‘ultra-spiritual’ and got in tune with the great cosmic being (god or whatever you want to call it) so much thanks to an online queer masjid I joined and doing the daily prayers with them. And now… it feels strangely empty. I don’t know… it’s weird.

Also, shoutout to my awesome mom for helping me get organized in my writing stuff. She phoned me for over an hour, talking me through all my various projects and helping me make a 40 hour work week, complete with social media time and when to write and when to record my audiobooks! Yeah! So if I suddenly seem to be posting and doing stuff more regularly, you know why, haha.

Anyways, I hope y’all have a lovely week and really enjoy today’s installation in Lage’s Game! I really enjoyed writing it!

Much love, y’all.

Author’s Rant! (SPOILERS)

Wait, WTF did I just write? Bella is back? WHAT is that bitch doing free? I thought I was done with her! I was so sure her book was closed! But then poof! A rogue Bella appears.

If I was the reader, I’d be pissed. What the hell? I’d be all ‘can’t you let a character be gone’, ‘can’t you move the story along without her’?

Well, you see, here’s the thing. I was planning on there being a Bella in this story. A Bella from another dimension, so it’d be another version of herself. A different Bella. And maybe that Bella will still make an appearance. But I had never intended the Bella to make a re-appearance. Never, never, nope. I had that book all nicely and neatly closed.

And you know what? Now this throws me into a conundrum! Oh, woe, will Chaos go out with Bella again? Yay? Or Nay? Personally I still kind of ship them, but for them to be a healthy relationship Bella would still have to grow a Lot. So hmmm… where does this take us? Also, now the fuck what? Will Lucifer allow Bella back into the reins of hell? I doubt it, but this really complicates the story! I wasn’t expecting there to be this dimension to it! I thought it was all going to be in another world, all about these aliens and Kuryo. But nooo, Chaos had to go and make it all about themselves haha. Oh well, what the fuck.

I hope y’all have a nice day, with plenty of happy times! Thank you so much to everyone who’s been following along with my story, I really appreciate it!



Author’s RANT/Reflection (SPOILERS)

Ooooh yeah. I just did that. Not only did I just make cookies for my wifey, but! I also wrote what I feel to be a bit of a controversial piece.

What? Kuryo? Manipulating? Abso-fucking-lutely! And how does he do it? By playing with his own emotions to trick the other who can read his mind. Whoah, that was fun.

As much of my writing, this part was based off my own mind-fuckery experiences. Namely, for this one, willing to feel something.

When I was little, I tried to screw with my own brain. I moved a pencil, then really, seriously, questioned myself if I had moved it. The point being that I made myself become unsure of my own memories and thoughts at a young age.

I don’t counsel it. It screwed with my head in a bad way. BUT! It did make me malleable, and that malleability probably led to my mental illnesses being worse and bla bla bla, but it also led me to sometimes making myself feel things that weren’t there. Like, could I make myself feel, upon a whim, this emotion? Believe that this thing I knew wasn’t real to be real? Hell yes!

In short, I’ve done what Kuryo was doing. It’s possible. Don’t come at me in the comments saying ‘but you can’t fake feelings!’ (not that any of you lovely readers would. Y’all are the best readers). You absolutely can. You can trick your own mind. And I’ve done it lots! It really, really, screwed with my sense of reality. I tend to feel, deep down, like anything is possible. It’s not good when it begins applying to your physics laws in your head, but hey, it made me super good at quantum physics?

Anyways! Back to the story! Kuryo just tricked his way out of the Academy’s lair by tricking the Academy’s subconscious to fall in love with him and run away on a ‘honeymoon’ with him. Yep. Totally a douche move, in my opinion. But what other option did he have?

But what does this mean? \O.O/ That, well, Kuryo isn’t a saint, aaaaaaand – maybe he’s also screwing a bit much with his own brain? Is he really going to be able to stay separate from the Academy or will they merge? Or is something terrible going to happen? * Gasp! *

Also, anyone else pick up the subtle nod that there’s a new ‘they’ in the story? As in, the Academy has someone else to pick a fight with instead of the (useless) rebellion? Heheheheheheh, more villains, more!

Also, who thinks Kuryo is going to fall in love with the Academy? Or will they become one self-hating particle? Or will they split and fight in an epic way? I really don’t know! Like, I kind of feel they would be fun together as one person (maybe with a split/dissociated identity?), but I don’t entirely ship it either. But Kuryo does seem to be the kind to add on all kinds of parts to himself, so why wouldn’t he add on this part as well? So much to think about!

Also, be prepared for a massive plot twist in Kuryo’s story. Which reminds me of a post on Instagram that I can’t quite remember what it was exactly, but it was about an author’s story being predictable and boring. Like “what do you do when your readers are bored and the story is predictable?” And I remember just sitting there and staring at that photo/comment and going ‘oh yeahhhh, not everyone writes cracked-out stories like I do. Right, right, right.’

Heck, I don’t even know for real what’s going to happen next in so many of my stories. Remember Bella and Chaos? Those two were supposed to end up together! Together! Now they are what? Apart! A-part!

Also, I had another idea, speaking of instagram. A fellow author (who I wish I could remember who it was!) did a makeup free video of themselves reading the beginning of their novel. And I thought that it could be fun, to film myself reading out parts of my novels. Anyone think this could be fun, or just me? It could be fun, or it could be just another massive time suck 😦 But hey! Maybe I could put on all this epic gothic makeup aaand… talk about fairytales? I don’t know. Thoughts?

“Attack of the White Clouds”; Chapter Three, Part One

Without a single question H- and D- followed me. They even seemed happy. Ch- was a different story altogether.

“So that is it? We are just going wherever she points?”

“You don’t have a better idea,” D- said sharply. H- chuckled.

“Well what about the food? Does she know what we are going to eat out here?”

I pointed her way without bothering to look. She squeaked. “Me?! We’re going to eat me?!”

The rest of us laughed heartily. When he was done, H- said “She meant you were in charge of that. I think. I mean, we could try and eat you for supper if you want. Your idea, I suppose,”

“Oh, very funny!” Ch- snapped.

“It was your idea,” D- said smugly.

And so the day wore on.

Tirelessly we retraced the lands we’d just crossed that day. Night was falling and still I did not want to rest. It grew dark around us and H- suggested we rest but I felt deaf to his words. The jug now strapped to my back I felt the tug, the pull, ad followed it relentlessly.

“Are you going to walk us to death? We need to eat!” Ch- called out bitterly from behind. As I turned I realized they all were behind, lagging in exhaustion. A bolt of fear ran through me. I’d been too caught up in myself to guide them properly. So I rushed towards them, shaking my head. D- smiled wearily at me as I took them by the shoulders in a silent plea for forgiveness. The purple lips chuckled and their warm hands patted my arms. “You look so worried. We are not that tired. We can keep walking if you feel the need to.”

I shook my head vehemently. Looking around, I took in the lands around us. Curving pillars of rock that jutted up from the bedrock. here and there it lay bare in cresting slices like waves. moss grew over it, red in hue and determined. Bitter, too. Not good to eat.

I pointed to Ch-, and desperately tried to speak. Guilt pressed heavily over me. How long had we walked? The night was very dark and the moon treacherously high in the sky. “F-f-f-”

“Food?” Ch- asked with a sneer. “How am I to find that?”

“I think that any hunter worth their salt can find that, even in this dark,” D- said smoothly as they took my hands from their shoulders. “Why not cast camp? I will go find flowers and the good moss. At least that can ease our hunger.”

Ch- made an unhappy rasping sound at the idea. It was not a filling supper, certainly, and for that I felt guilty. But as D- walked away H- shook his head and smiled at me. “You are certainly a very motivated leader. I am glad I followed you.”

I nodded firmly, courage returning. Once more I knew that I would lead them. It was in the pull, in my destiny. Fated.

Then D- came running back. A thick chunk of moss peppered with flowers was clutched in one fist, and the other pointed to the sky wildly. “The eye! The eye! Look-” and we all did.

It was nearly invisible in this dark. The sky, already hued with a gentle covering of clouds, was now bearing a swiftly moving blot. That’s all it was, a blot that moved with a silver hue to it. It glistened, and those sparkling shards moved amongst it. What gleamed the most, and could be seen clearly when the moonlight struck it a certain way, or when it blinked, was the eyes. Those monstrous things.

Ch- made an angry noise, her horns and fins rising along her face. Her sword drew with a hiss- but I held out a hand. We were tired. The fight was not for now.

Crouching to the ground, I urged the others to follow. Like when a violent storm came, I lay down flat on the earth. In a crevice of the rocky plains, so that I may blend in.

Hesitantly the other followed. Ch- did so with much more noise. “That is all? We are lying down? Is this your idea of a fight?”

I clapped a hand over her mouth and forced her head down into the earth.

Overhead, the cloud was passing. The eyes were fixated upon the horizon as if still seeing our people far away. My stomach churned, first with fear, then with anxious realization as its tail wound through the air above us and it progressed towards the ocean. It would follow them. They were not safe. It soared on as if the waters were no barrier for it- and only once it grew faint over the sky did I try and rise.

Three pairs of hands yanked me down. Ch- muttered in a low hiss, the only one daring to speak. “Look, you idiot! Look before you move!”

Forced to, I did. Horror seized me. The urge to scream and run was overwhelming as I saw more clouds than ever before. This was more than any storm could furnish.

They were layered three high, piling over each other. They filled the sky now, from the horizon and beyond and now this army was passing over us. Gliding oozily on, they moved like oil over water. They would merge as the winds pushed them together then they would part in different ways as they drifted on. Each eye was special, different from the others in its shape or color. Some were purple, some shimmered and others gleamed with the power over fire or light itself. Yet they never stayed still. Restless, agitated, they would shift with the moving of the wind and pass from one cloud to another, then back again and perhaps on to yet another cloud. It was senseless and strange. Terrifying in how unlike it was anything natural or correct in this world.

It seemed like an eternity we lay there, breathing heavily and yet trying not to breathe from fright. It was senseless to fight this many- and was there even a point to try and keep fighting? To my horror I realized that now was the time we could confront them and yet it was impossible. Not that many. We were but four and they- thousands!

Thoughts jumbled and fear came in waves as I saw eyes blinking and glancing down at the earth occasionally. Yet we were not seen. Mercifully, as the sun began to gleam on the horizon, the sky was clear once more. Stars sparkled as if to comfort us.

We rose, achy and trembling. “Well that was mighty brave of us,” Ch- said with sarcasm. Irritated, she brushed dust and dew from herself.

D- scowled and looked down at the moss and flowers they still held in their hands. H- shook himself off and readjusted his scarf. “What do we do now?” he asked softly. “They have passed us and there is no way we’ll ever fight them all.”

I rubbed my neck and looked at the sky. fear seemed to have loosened my tongue. “We- south, still,” I nodded with determination. “Fight them later.” They would come back, something told me. They were hunting our people, and soon they would realize some had escaped. They would chase after us.

“How exactly do you plan on killing all of those things?” Ch- said sharply. “There were three thousand of them!”

I startled. So did H- and D-, who said what I wasn’t thinking. “You counted?” D- asked.

“Well someone had to,” Ch- said bitterly. “I counted the eyes. There was a lot, but only so many per cloud. Roughly, there was three thousand.”

I plucked at some dirt stuck to my arm. Three thousand… “South,” I insisted. “We go south. Then, we go north.” And I nodded to Ch- in deference. Once I’d led, then it would be her turn. We would try every plan we could think of.

Ch- seemed startled by this. She paused, looking me over as if expecting this to be some trick. With a certain amount of caution she nodded while crossing her arms. “What do you expect to find down south? Do you think they have built a stronghold?”

Their lands are the wind, and beyond the sea. They swept down from the stars- why would they have built anything upon the land that is so fragile to them? No, I did not know what I was searching for. But the jug tugged me home.

I tried to say all this, that in their tracks we may find how to destroy those white eyes that we’d only ever been able to turn away- but all that came out was a garble. In my haste my tongue was not even making words.

Ch- seemed to deflate. Scoffing she looked away. “We’re following a babbling fool,” she muttered before H- smacked her on the back of the head.

“She’s not a fool,” he hissed “she just can’t talk.”

“But children can do that! Even infants can speak more than she- ” I turned my back and pointed to the moss that D- was sourly still holding. We needed to eat, then we needed to rest. I gestured to my mouth, then to the earth and feigned resting.

“Good idea,” D- said swiftly before Ch- could interrupt. “We ought to at least rest a little. I will take the first watch.” And they set about pulling utensils from their bag to grind up the moss and soften the flowers for eating. I plopped to sit on the earth, taking the jug from my back and setting it into my lap. It’s blue glaze sparkled at me, bumps glistening in the early sun’s rays. What message did this jug now bear? As I pondered that, Ch- sat near me. For a blink of an eye we looked at each other, then she looked away as if offended. I returned to contemplating the jug.

Once we ate we lay down to rest. D- took the first watch of an hour, as they had said. H- took the rest. Ch- and I would take the watch when we next rested. For now, we slept a precious few hours before it grew too hot to sleep. Then, we wrapped the scarves around us and plodded on.

Chaotic Comic Book Chapter Eleven Part Two

Happy holidays everyone! Here’s an impromptu gift -> a sneak peek at what I’ve been struggling with lately! I’m showing this to you because I think, finally, that I have a result that I like. It’s not entirely everything, I have a small stack of sketches that I’m hoarding, but this is what I’ve colored in successfully.

Again, what will I do with it long-term? I’m not sure. But if I do succeed in drawing out the whole chaos story – I might just try and sell it instead of posting it for free because it’s a HELLA LOT of work. But then again – will I really do that, or just a little bit? I’m not sure. Either way, I’m super proud that I managed to do what I’ve done, and really want to keep up with it. I really enjoy it. Drawing a story out is a challenge that I haven’t done yet, especially something that’s written out (so I can’t change it to make it easier to draw!).

Anyways, I really hope you all enjoy these 🙂 Really, do let me know what you think! I know that the result is kind of scrappy and not the cleanest looking, but I kind of like it like that. It sort of looks like a kid drew half of it. I know I could be way more perfectionist and demand more precision, more finesse (better scenery, cough cough), but…  this is a style that I feel I could upkeep without too much mental strain or anxiety. This also integrates my sort of sketchy miniature style with my more detailed style. Plus, hey, I like it.


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Meet the Narrator!/Ranger’s Prologue

Hey everyone! Are you ready to meet the narrator for the Ranger story (which still doesn’t have a title, haha)? If you are then -> beHOLD! Your incredibly non-reliable narrator. I am sharing here a few pictures of them that I have made, just to help you visualize.  After that, just a little scroll below, is the prologue to Ranger’s story.

As I have said before, this story means so much to me and I am SO EXCITED to share it, even just a little piece of it, with you all. So to one and all out there reading -> please let me know what you think! Do you like the narrator? Is there a character/deity you would like to see sketched out? What do you expect to happen next? EEEEEE!!!! I’m so excited!

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Oh, hello. There you are. Along for the ride? Just out of a body and waiting for the next? Well! Let me tell you a tale. Or rather, let me show you.

Imagine a light shining down amidst the pitchest darkness you have ever seen. It strikes an individual, but no flooring. The individual just is, floating with no wings. Like only the earliest born of the Void, they bear a mask of power. A bright pink mask. This mask has one sideways black eye tearing on the bearer’s left hand side. No smile, no frown. Beneath the pink shirt is broad shoulders, yet a slim frame. White gloves ending in black and white zigzags grace the arms that are just a little too long for the body. A short pink skirt hang down mid-thigh and boots begin at the knee in the black and white zigzags. The feet are poised as if dancing. That graceful figure would be me. And them? The first-born gods of the Void.

“You now stand before the council of the gods,” intones a voice.

Before the coerced one (me!) spreads a great marble floor. Just beyond reach. Sitting on raised stone seats all around are the earliest born of the Void and even some exalted ones. To name a few, there is the god of ice, Kosara, with his white raiments and triangular frost-like embellishments. Hakuzo, of the fire realm, complete with horns and glowing eyes over a pitch black robe. Mumboso, of the earthen realm, all round happiness and flower decorations. She is married to Kosara, but now she is frowning at his side. Even the scrolls-keeper is here, Tetiana. Oh Tetiana is a slim and frail thing, no mask at all, just a long and sad face.

It is Tetiana who speaks, bravely uprooting herself from civility. “Where is Lady Justice?”

The accused, the spirit of Justice’s sword (me!), wrings their hand. They scratch at their pink mask.

In the beginning, it all happened so innocently. Hakuzo accused Kosara of wanting to breach the marriage contract between their children. Kosara demanded Justice take his side.

And yet Justice was nowhere to be found. Her sword however (me!), was found lounging in Justice’s home, asleep. And that was days ago.

“Well now, she could be anywhere,” said I, most unhelpfully.

As usual, I was not lying, but it was hardly helpful.

Hakuzo burst to her feet, great horns aflame. “Where is she? We have important matters to settle!”

‘I am here,’ Lady Justice would usually say, entering so calmly. She would be wearing a suit of armor, one of the Void’s many luxurious gifts upon her.

And yet she was not here. A very worrisome thing to these gods who depended upon Justice to settle their petty disputes.

“I’m sure she’ll be back soon,” I squeaked, wringing my hands.

“Oh, I’m sure I know where she is,” crawled out a voice, slinking and slithering across the air like only a coward’s voice can.

This spirit bore no mask. It was deformed as only a spirit can be, dripping and oozing and licking at itself where wounds ought to have healed long ago. It slunk along between the thrones, slipping across the floor. “Lady Justice is lost within the Void,” cooed this spirit.

The gods shuddered. This spirit turned on itself, facing the gods and trying to blot out the sword-spirit’s image (me!). “It is dangerous to be too close to the Void,” sneered the spirit. “Perhaps she fell too deeply into its embrace.”

The gods gasped. No more Justice? Could that be?

“Lady Justice has been missing for seven days, if not more,” whined the spirit, twisting on itself to look left and right at the assembly. “None can live for more than three days without wasting away within the Void. Is that not true?”

The gods bowed their head in unison.

I flustered out my arms. “I’m sure she’s not dead! She’s maybe just-”

All the divines lifted their heads. They sensed the truth about to burst out.

But all I had to say was “Missing?” with a sad shrug. Who knew where Lady Justice could be?

Behind their masks, the Great ones frowned. They hummed, they hawwed. The slinking one meandered back towards Kosara’s throne. Hakuzo’s glare followed.

For this meandering spirit, a lone son of hers that she was most displeased about the existence of, had endeared himself to Kosara and Mumboso by giving away secrets of Hakuzo’s lands. Secrets that only those who weilded the powers of flame ought to now.

Now, as an insult to Hakuzo and her daughter of choice, Ursula, this snivelling spirit was vying for Kosara and Mumboso’s youngest son. A vying that seemed it would succeed, by the way he was allowed to slink directly beside Kosara’s throne.

Hakuzo shook with anger. What an insult! Why, this marriage could have been peace between their lands! Jumping to her feet, she roared “So be it!” She stamped her foot, and the whole floor shook. “Justice is dead!” she flung a finger to point at Kosara. “And my daughter shall not marry your son!”

“What a relief!” huffed Mumboso, fanning herself with her feather fan.

“What?” a softer voice demanded.

All heads turned. Just behind Hakuzo’s throne, a spirit was drawing onto the floor.

Unlikethe snivelling one, she had a form and shape. Her hair was blonde like the sun, her robe black, her eyes orange like the lava she commanded and just like her mother she bore the curling horns of a fire wielder. This was Ursula, Hakuzo’s favourite.

“You will not marry any more,” Hakuzo snorted, sitting back down in her chair with a graceless thump. “That snot over there has decided to break his word.”

“It was not a marriage that could last! Lava cannot marry snow!” Kosara barked back, his voice strong like the cracking of ice.

Ursula turned on her heel and marched away, back into the darkness. Tears stung at her eyes. She had known this was coming, had sensed it within her travels in the Void. Now she knew just what she had to do.

But Hakuzo and the others thought she had gone off to cry. And so they let Ursula vanish from their midst.

The meeting adjourned, the scroll was rolled up, and the gods split themselves between their alliances. Those who traded with Mumboso swiftly strode to her side of the platform. Fewer, yet more powerful spirits, drew to Hakuzo’s side.

Dirty looks were glanced between sides as they left, each parting different ways into the darkness of the Void.

As was often the case, no one thought of what to do with the one they had been questioning, their victim of the day.

And so I slipped away, thinking that I was lucky none could read my mind. They’d know what fools they were.

“My Name is Chaos”: Chapter Five, Part Two

Hi everyone! I just wanted to let everyone know that I’m doing well, that things are nice on my side of the world. 🙂 I just upped my testosterone, and my voice is breaking/deepening! I just hosted a very nice full moon ritual too, so I’m happy. I have so many ideas for this story, and really can’t wait to share it all with you! Surprises are coming! Do please comment if you read, I love chatting about my stories and seeing people read and enjoy it really boosts my day!

I wish you all a lovely day ❤


The vampires stared at me. Snowflakes fluttered left and right. It was cold, and I was fucking freezing, okay? So I stamped my feet and cursed.

No, they couldn’t just ‘bring me in because I gave a pretty speech’. They were smarter than that. So the big dude was on a tiny cellphone, holding up one arm in the air, then the other.

“Your body is not a channeling wire,” I hissed as he tried standing on one leg to reach higher.

“The reception here is bad,” he said to me as if I hadn’t already concluded that. Then he waved his arm around again, trying to literally ‘catch’ the signal, maybe?

The scientist shuffled next to me, hugging his lab coat around himself. “By the way,” he said , prodding me with an elbow. “My name is Leo.”

“Oh, yeah,” I said, completely ignoring him.

“Don’t just ditch me somewhere,” he hissed between his teeth. Whoah, reading my mind much?

I glared at him. “I don’t owe you anything.”

He gave me a hard look. “No, you owe me your life.”

“Do not.”

He blinked slowly. The icy wind blew between us. He looked every bit as frustrated as someone standing in the cold, realizing they’d just hinged their lives on → me. Chaos. I lived up to my name, okay?

“I was going to escape one way or another,” I said dryly, looking back around at the bundled up vampires. Some had taken hermitage back within their car. Others still tried to keep up their menacing auras while huddling like penguins.

“You- oh for fuck’s sake,” grumbled Leo. “You were literally about to become little bits in a petri dish. I saved you. Now the deal was-”

“So sad, don’t care,” I muttered. “Shut up.”

He looked ready to crack me one. I stalked past him, crunching through the snow to stand by the beefy guy who was now frowning down at his cellphone.

“Give me that,” I ordered.

The beefcake looked at me. He had removed his sunglasses due to the fact that it was (duh) dark out here. He looked somehow less menacing with pea-sized eyes. I held out my hand in a silent order.

To my surprise, the phone was put in my hand. “You got cellphone powers or what?” the beefcake asked.

“Yeah, check this out,” I said, turning away and chucking the dumb thing at arm’s length into the forest. Yeah! Great shot!

I turned back around, spreading my arms. “See? I made it disappear.”

The vampires gawked. Those who were still trying to look cool took off their sunglasses to make sure they’d seen it right.

“The phone,” moaned beefyMcbeefcake.

“Yeah, so,” I snapped. “Let’s go.”

The vampires gawked at me. I had the feeling I was missing something. Why such horror?

Then, faintly, I heard the phone ringing. The vampires launched into action. “Get It!” roared the beefcake. “The boss’s call can’t be missed!”

Oh. Shit. Way to endear myself to them.

So, yeah, I stood there like a goof while the horde of vampires vanished into the pine trees, scattering in bat form. A mere minute later, one returned, reappearing in humanoid form before the beefcake. She was wearing a snowsuit and really, only her nose was visible under that wool hat.

“Hello?” beefMcburgerarms answered the phone. “Yes, boss!” He turned a nasty eye to me, then to Mark and Leo. “We’ve found something. No, we haven’t captured the escaped hellion. But we found someone else. Do we bring them to you?”

I held my breath and wished for my dice. I’d have tossed it right then if –

“Okay, yes,” the beefy nodded. Then, with a surprised sound, he held the phone away from his ear. “oh,” he said softly. “She hung up.”

My skin crawled. “She?” I asked. Because, screw me, I didn’t get along well with females. Or women. Or really, anyone, but particularly not with women. Example in case: my fiancee. Who was right now probably crying to her daddy about how mean I was to her and blablabla.

But let’s focus back here. The vampires were staring at me like I was a sexist little shit.

“Yeah, so?” asked another woman vamp who was wearing a banana yellow coat that left no shape to her but a giant blob.

“I just,” I fished in my mind, trying to remember what female was in charge in the vampire legions. None came to mind. They usually were bald-headed guys with fangs who liked to speak dramatically. No women allowed in their dumb club.

So who was this leader?

I shrugged. “I’d love to meet her.”

The badguys snorted. “Sure you will. Get in the car.”

I looked at the already-cramped looking vehicle. And we weren’t all already in it yet. “Uh…”

Well, we fit. I spent the entire ride cramped on someone’s lap. Not so luckily, Leo was sitting in people’s footspace, and Mark had three vampires piled in his lap. No one was a happy camper.

At least I got to watch the scenery change as we drove on. The pine trees receded to give way to rolling fields and little farms that were all bundled up for winter. Then those faded away sharply, giving way to a pretty plain-looking city. It was all cubes and granite, with french street names that I couldn’t pronounce to save my life.

We turned on a road that was probably named after a croissant, and wham! The brakes went on.

“Fucking deer!” cursed the beefcake as we swerved on the silent road around a very still deer. A deer with blue eyes that stared straight at me through the windows.


Luckily, there was no traffic, and we avoided the very much there ditch and electrical pole. Onwards we zoomed, vampires muttering about how hazardous this climate was- and I noticed that hey, there really was no traffic here. That and the deer had vanished.

We swerved, veered, and passed important-looking buildings in the center of town. The street lights weren’t working, the snow was piling thicker and thicker with no plow in sight, and I had the feeling that civilization under vampire rule had come to a stand-still.

Then we drew up to a house. A friggin’ house.

It was one of those cute oldsie victorian style houses, with frills and ruffles and the whole shingle thing going on. In this light, it was, well, dark with lighter highlights. Green and white maybe? Who knows? The important things was this: the driveway was shoveled neatly, baring the asphalt driveway.

Asphalt is very hard, I realized as the car doors were opened and I was gracelessly flung out.

“God dammit,” I hissed, cursing and rubbing my elbows. I rose to my feet as the vampires piled out around me, dragging Leo out by the scruff and prodding Mark on with knives.

We were ushered up onto the porch. Frilly curtains hid the interior of the house, but dim lights shone through. The beefcake cleared his throat, straightened his posture, and knocked on the door. In fact, all the vampires straightened their posture. Some even began put on their best smiles.

The door was opened by a maid in a frilly outfit and stockings and the whole deal. “Welcome,” she whispered, fang-less and lowering her gaze. Human. Ah.

She stepped aside, letting us all troop haughtily in. “The master is in the painting room,” she said in a hushed tone. She didn’t dare look anyone in the eyes as she began taking coats.

To my glee, the majority of the vampires stayed in the entry. Only two accompanied me and the beefcake as I was walked into the house.

And damn, it was a nice house. It was filled with all this polished wood and spiralling staircases and neat frames. Except when I double checked one frame, it wasn’t an oldsie picture of some victorian person, as would be expected. It was a Buddha, styled in black and white to suit the theme.

Rattling myself, I wondered what sort of bad guy/badgirl kept buddhas around. Well, I was about to find out, wasn’t I?

Up the imposing staircase, we were faced with a thick door. Beefy guy rapped his knuckles on it, straightening his posture again.

“Enter,” said a female voice.

Chapter One is posted – for FREE!

Yes,  it is! Chapter one of my lgbt trans-centric novel is now up and available in my facebook reading group HERE.

What ho! Terrible shenanigans are appearing! A Frog King has made his way on stage, and fairies have a mischievous plot as to how to get rid of him! Really, just come and read 🙂

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