Chaos & Kuryo (novel 3) Chapter 14 part 2

Chaos POV

I couldn’t sleep. My drunk ass just lay there, staring at the ceiling. Time passed, and eventually I wasn’t drunk anymore, just very thirsty. I refused to get up any more though, deciding that I would just get into more trouble.

My mind drifted in nothingness and I didn’t so much sleep as I dozed. Then, for real, I fell asleep.

I knew the moment I was asleep because I felt someone breathing next to me. Someone who’s presence I knew now.

“Sephira?” I turned, looking around on myself (in the dream). I was in a nowhere zone that slowly took the shape of a cathedral-esque setting. There were glorious statues, pews, but no lights save for lamps.

The heavy breathing drew closer. I turned around again – and there was Sephira!

“Sephira!” I lurched and grabbed her by the shoulders. Her eyes were still blindfolded, her walking sticktapping along the ground, and se was in a white robe full of bloody hand prints at the hem, but she smiled.

“Hey you,” she said happily, prying my fingers from her shoulders. “You’re not who I was expecting to see.”

Ouch. I was even screwing up on an astral level. Wow, Chaos. Good job.

Sephira patted me on the shoulder. “Go home, Chaos,”

Wham! I sat up in bed. The bed, Lucifer’s bed. The bed that Lucifer lent me.

I looked around. My throat was parched. The sheets were rumpled around me and I was drenched in sweat.

Go home, Chaos. The words rang in my ears. I wasn’t needed there. I wasn’t needed anywhere.

Furious, I stormed out of the bed and marched into the shower. I wasn’t needed. That’s how bad of a screw up I was. The deity that I was supposed to help was all ‘nope, I’d rather not, thanks’

Go home!

I showered like I was covered in demon juice, scraping myself raw with an exfoliator and scrubbing so intensely I just about ran out of soap.

Finally, I stepped out of the shower and dressed in some of the clothes that Lucifer had provided (plain, black, blah). When I stepped out of the bathroom, I was face to face with a very grumpy fallen angel.

“Lucifer wants to meet with you,” they said, checkign their watch. “Fifteen minutes ago.”

I rolled my eyes. Great! I couldn’t even shower without screwing something up. Watch – I’ll have clogged the drain or something like that by the time I turn around.

I stormed downstairs, determined to glare and glower at Lucifer the whole time he gave me a talking to. But somehow, the more I walked, the less stomp I had. Pretty soon, by the time I was escorted into a sort of dining room, I felt sheepish. I had forced my way into Lucifer’s bedroom – but he had let me! And…

I found my mind crowded with all sorts of feelings as I looked at Lucifer. He was sitting at the table (all carved with ugly faces in it and leaves and stuff like that), and wearing a silky black robe that cinched at the waist and flared out into a massive skirt. Half his chest was showing (as usual?) and his headdress sparkled with fine chains and studs around his horns.

As I just stood there, thinking but not really managing to sort through my thoughts, he crooked a finger at me. “Come here,” he ordered silkily.

I took two steps forward, then stopped. The door shut behind me pointedly. I crossed my arms and scowled impatiently, like I had something better to do.

Lucifer’s lips curled into a half-sneer. “Chaos, you’ve grown up a lot since you left. You’re an adult now, am I right?”

I shrugged. “I’m nineteen.” In human years, that was. In actual years, I was much older, but you could say my age was nineteen, mentally.

Lucifer’s eyebrows rose then descended in a sour expression. “Did I use an expression that’s too old for you?” He drummed his fingers on a white box beneath his hands, on the table. It was wide and flat and – what was in it?

Curiosity piqued, I tried not to fixate. So I dragged my gaze back to Lucifer – and found him waiting. He’d said something. Oh crap.

I shrugged, hoping that was a proper answer. After all, you never heard of someone selling their soul with a shrug, right? You had to actually sign something.

Lucifer closed his eyes. Sighed. Opened his eyes and gestured to a seat across the table from him. “Sit down.”

I walked to the chair, pulled it out, and thunked down. Lucifer glimmered across from me, piercing eyes latched on me. But the box – something about it was drawing my attention. Probably because it was something I hadn’t screwed up yet.

With a sigh I looked at Lucifer and told myself to focus. He was either about to throw me out or – ask me for something. Which (spoiler!) I’d probably screw up.

I found myself slouching down miserably.

Lucifer drummed his long nails once, then made a face. “Do you know what it usually means when someone – especially not a relative – says things like ‘oh how you’ve grown’? Especially when it’s about you being an adult now?”

Oh gawd. A history lesson? Really? I shook my head.

Lucifer leaned across the table, hands perched like dangerous vipers on the box. “It means they want to get into your pants now.”

Oh- OH. I blinked, then stared at Lucifer. But he’d said that. Why did he say that?

“I have a proposal,” he said, leaning back. With both hands, he pushed the box towards me in a slide.

My heart jumped. The white box called to me from the middle of the table. O-kay. It couldn’t hurt to just… take a look?

Gingerly, I drew the box to myself. It was a fancy thing, with a fabric lining to it, like those engagement ring boxes have.

I lifted the lid.

The inside was all white plush, and the thing was deep black, glinting with silver chains. A collar. A beautiful, ornate, collar.

A collar.

I looked up at Lucifer, jaw agape. The guy liked me.

He glared at me, but there was a hint of a blush on those pale cheeks. “If you don’t like it, you can give it back,” he said harshly. “And we can both forget about it.”

I looked down at it. It was such a pretty collar. There was a star in the middle, with chains draping out to the sides and small studs sparkling here and there.

I liked it. Greedily, I wanted it.

But – I looked up at Lucifer. Was he really offering – ? My throat went dry as I remembered everything that had happened with Bella. Oh, how much worse it could be with a god on the scale of Lucifer. The god who had already played games with me.

Such a bad idea. Such a, such such such a bad idea.

I looked up at Lucifer. Our eyes met, and his lips quirked into a satisfied smirk. He knew.

Serpent-like, he reached across the table and drew the box back to himself. Settled back in his chair, he was as smug as could be. My face was burning. “Let’s discuss the terms then, shall we?” he said silkily.

“Just More Chaos”; Chapter Six, Part Two

The day was officially over. It was lights out in the barracks, and I was alone in my room that was more of a cell. Thoughts filled my head, making a successful barrage against any and all sorts of sleep. It was like sleep was trying to tiptoe in and the thoughts just kept booting it out off the scene. Fun.

There was thoughts of Conan, Kuryo, whatever his name was. Of him and that dumb ‘we could date, if you were less of a jerk’, sort of thing. As if.

Then I flipped over, and found myself staring at the ceiling. There, FoxFace would be telling me that hey, all we had to do was kidnap Bella again or get her blood → that was actually what Charr (the cat!) had been trying to do, but I screwed it all up.

I flipped over, and felt like my parents were staring at me from the abyss of darkness in this room.

Disgruntled, I sat up. My hair was sticking up like a porcupine’s hairdo and I was just – pissed. Angry. Frustrated. Wanted to slam something but that probably wouldn’t be enough.

I got dressed knowing full well what I was going to do but pretending that I wasn’t. I told myself I was just getting dressed. Just, you know, going for a stroll. Just heading down the hallway.

“Now what?” sighed a voice from the door next to mine as I passed it.

I spun – and you guessed it! Mr handsome jerk-face. Conan. Looking so impatient and fed up.

“You’re up to something,” he said. With a nod he added “You got your coat and weapons.”

“Going for a walk,” I grumbled.

“In that mood?” he said snarkily.

I scowled. “Stay out of my head.”

“It’s not your head, it’s your vibes-”

“Can it!” hissed Charr from behind him as she stepped forward. With one possessive hand on Conan’s shoulder she glared at me. “What are you doing?”

I pressed my lips together. “Walk?”

Well, I tried. Not my fault they weren’t convinced.

“Even I can guess you’re about to stir shit,” Charr said flatly.

I glared at the two of them. Absolutely no way I was telling them.

“He’s going to see Bella,” said Conan in a loud whisper to his girlfriend. She rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“Hey!” I snapped. My sword clicked out and I accidentally pointed it instead of a finger at mister. “Shut it!”

Charr seized my wrist and twisted. I yelped and my sword clattered to the floor. She released me, and I stumbled back, pride wounded severely.

“You ever think that you shouldn’t run back to her like a puppy with its tail between its legs?” sighed Conan.

“I was not going to do that!” I hissed, rubbing my wrist. I am no one’s puppy! No more!

“Then what?” Charr snorted. “Going to sweep her off her feet and carry her away?”

“No,” I said grudgingly, but even I wasn’t entirely convinced.

There was a judging silence. “You’re going to cause trouble,” Conan said heavily, as if he just didn’t have the energy for this.

“I-,” I tried to sort my thoughts. “I’m going to try and set things right. If we wait for you to feel better before attacking, Bella might open the portals upon us already. Tonight might be our last chance to catch her off guard.”

Charr crossed her arms. “She doesn’t seem to move that fast.”

I scowled. “Well, won’t you be surprised if she does?”

That made kitty-cat pause. I smirked. “Goodbye,” I snapped. Then, thinking that was maybe too melodramatic, I added “See you tomorrow.”

“Bye,” Conan said lamely as I walked away.

Dummy me, I left my sword behind.

/////

Now, the trick to getting out of here was certainly in the lab, so to the lab was where I headed. There, I found what’s-his-face the scientist with several others.

“I need a hot ride out of here,” I said flatly as I kicked the door shut behind myself.

“What shit are you trying to cause?” Leo asked casually, like I was his kid playing around his ankles.

“Why does everyone think I’m causing trouble?” I half-yelled, half-sneered. I clicked my sword out – and nothing came. I had no right sword. Crap. I looked down, then back up. Deciding to try diplomacy instead of brute force, I pocketed my right hand (but left my left out for further sword use). “Her highness Foxy told me to ask you to give me the pill so I can send myself out.”

Leo was unfazed, stacking petri dishes in a box. “No she didn’t,” he said so calmly. “That’s not how things work around here.” The other scientists barely looked up from what they were doing. I felt powerless – and this was not something I wanted to feel right then.

I snatched up a syringe with a long needle from the counter. “Hey!” Leo said as I filled it with air.

“Want to see what I can do with a syringe?” I sneered. “Give me the pill.”

Leo looked at me like I was a pain in the ass, but nothing more. “Really?” he asked.

I drew out my other sword for good measure. Because yeah, a syringe wasn’t really my most dangerous thing right then. “Really,” I said in my most bad-ass way possible. Hey, I could be a good bully.

Rolling his eyes, Leo reached for a drawer. I stepped back, fully expecting the nerd to pull out a gun or something. Instead he drew out a pot of pills. Popping it open, he shook one out and handed it to me.

“Have a nice trip,” he said coolly. “You know, I thought we were friends.”

“Fuck off,” I muttered as I swallowed the pill. Friends don’t spy on each other. He was just a jerk like miss FoxFace and all the others.

Then the wooziness hit me, and the world dissolved.

I reappeared in utter darkness, but the scent – that particular perfume – told me it was Bella’s bedroom. Of course, I thought as I staggered. Where the hell else would I send myself?

There was a rustling of bed sheets. In the darkness, I saw a figure sit up. “Chaos?”

As the room stopped turning, I heard footsteps. This pill really had its side effects last too long. I grudgingly held onto the wall as lights switched on.

“Hey,” I said. Bella was three steps away from me.

She tilted her head to the side, amused. “Hey,” she said. She was wearing silky black pajamas. Oh, the memories.

I looked away, stuffing my hands in my pockets awkwardly. I tried to think of what to say, what I had really come here for, but my throat was a lump and that’s where all my thoughts were.

“So,” Bella stepped to my side. Then she leaned straight into my bubble and whispered in my ear. “What’s it?”

Her fingers raked through my hair. They gripped me and tugged, and my heart quivered. Fuck, I missed her. I loved her. Trusted her.

She kissed me sweetly, then bit me. Just the way I loved it.

I just wanted to sink to my knees before her and be done with it. Forget me, the world, and everything. Just me and her in that happy and strange bond.

So for one moment, I just let myself relish in it.

It was one moment too long.

Woosh, was all I heard, then I felt something thud through me. I collapsed forward and Bella caught me.

“Good job,” she said happily. Then, nibbling my ear, she added “Good bye, Chaos.” And then she dropped me to the floor.

I saw myself fall, an arrow sticking out of my back. Bella stepped over me and waved happily at a beefcake of a vampire standing in the corner of the room. It handed her back her bow and arrows but she ignored them, instead taking a stake from the wall.

“This will do it,” she said cheerfully as she walked back to my body.

“Oh come on,” I groaned as she began the process of making sure I would never rise from the dead again. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” Because, yeah, vampires aren’t the only thing that humanity has found ways to keep stuck in their graves. Pestilent spirits, arrogant neighbors, they all have their own ways of coming back, so stakes through the heart usually keep them ‘where they belong’.

Thud – it was done with such an energetic swing of a mallet. I stared grimly at the grisly sight before me. I was such a fucking idiot.

“You can say that again,” said a voice beside me.

I yelped and turned – and saw two crows sitting in the windowsill. One was looking around like it was just there for the ride, but the other had a suspicious blue tinge to it and was eyeing me. As we made eye contact it stretched out its wings – strangely echoing the way Conan used to raise his arms to do his magic – and I was gripped.

Oh fuck no, I thought, but with a yank I was pulled into the crow. It was like I was a tiny ball of energy just tucked neatly into a pocket of its soul.

I could feel Conan laughing. Feel his heartbeat against his ribs.

For some strange reason it was cozy, nice, and even relaxing. I felt safe. Cared for. It was just too bad I knew he was taking me back to FoxFace as the world turned woozy.

“My Name is Chaos”; Chapter Fourteen, Part Two

Alright. I was cool, I was calm, I was completely in charge. I just felt like I was freaking out, but that was a feeling, not a reality. I felt ready for a meltdown, but that was NOT going to happen. I was in control.

I breathed deeply through the nose, then let it out. Okay. Calm.

Thumping my head down onto the table, I knew I was anything but. I’d always prided myself on being an independent and self-powerful and determined person. Now I missed Bella – because she’d told me what to do? What kind of sap was I? I never needed anyone!

With a groan I told myself that I was being an idiot. A weak, spineless, gutless, flop. Who needed someone to tell them what to do? A weak person, that’s who.

I clawed at my hair. That’s it! I rose top my feet, full of a decision. I was going to get rid of Bella. The angels were right → this was a virus! She, Bella, must have infected me with something! Something that was eating away at who I was, something that was changing me in my vital essence.

I turned, and yelped, jumping almost out of my skin. Because right there, right before my nose, was Bella.

“Missed me?” she cooed, strange smile ever in place. Like she was daring me to say otherwise.

My jaw hung open. A mirage, the back of my head told me. Just a flimsy outcropping from the part of her that’s hiding within you. Not really fully there.

If ever there was a chance at me battling, taking down Bella, here it was. This was just a piece of her, after all.

Instead I felt my knees buckling as her finger pointed me down, like we were linked through a string of communication and obedience. I barely registered the cold of the floor’s tiles beneath my knees. My heart was pounding, my eyes captivated by the vision before me.

A finger caressed my cheek. “Good,” she crooned, leaning over me. The studs and buckles on her clothing glinted in the light, her smile eerie. There was no scent to her as she came to a stop directly above my face, proof that she wasn’t fully there. “I’m no virus, Chaos,” she whispered. Her touch trailed to the back of my hair and I shuddered in pleasure as it gripped in my hair, tugging just the right amount. “But you promised yourself to me. And I don’t take that lightly.”

Butterflies were filling my stomach. I felt euphoric and couldn’t blame her for that. I was so happy, but the back of my mind was screaming in fury. How could she do this to me? How indeed, except for the fact that I wanted this, needed this on a carnal level?

“Indeed,” she whispered before kissing me gently. It was chaste, short, and left me hoping for more. But then she let go of my hair and stepped back. I was free, but only in a simplistic way. Truly, her sepll was still over me.

Her smile turned wicked as she looked me over. My heart thudded in my throat and I hoped vainly that she liked what she saw.

If she’d heard my thought, she didn’t comment on it. “You’re going to go to earth and find my body,” she said, eyes lingering over my chest.

She stepped back to me. My heart skipped a beat and I craned my neck to look up at her. I felt flushed and bare from how much she was staring at me. She stooped again, reaching for my necklaces this time. With a twist of her wrist she wound the necklaces around her fist, tightening them around my throat. “No more of this backing out or being silly. You obey me.”

I caught myself nodding, hoping for a kiss. For maybe a little more.

She chuckled, drawing me from my foolish thoughts. The necklaces thudded against my chest as she let go, and she pushed my head down into a bow. The touch lifted from my head, and I saw that her boots were gone. I looked around, and she had vanished.

For a moment the happiness and elation continued. Bella had been here! To see me!

Then, like a cold deluge, the realization settled in. I was sunk. I was a failure. Either the virus was in full swing, or the part of me that loved Bella was… submissive.

I hugged myself, digging my nails painfully into my arms. What the hell?!, I asked myself. You’re better than this! Get help! Be sensible!

Squeezing my eyes shut, I knew all that. But I felt, I felt, that I could not betray her. I loved her. Deep down, as I breathed and calmed myself, I became resigned to my fate. A fate by her side, on my knees.

Yes, it was becoming clearer as I relaxed. Some spirits dedicated themselves to causes and capacities, others to the causes of larger spirits. I would be one of those. I would dedicate myself to Bella.

It wasn’t from a lack of choice, I realized as I stood to my wobbly feet. It was just that, a choice, and my head knew I was making the wrong one, but it felt so right in my core. Bella had taken hold of my heartstrings and I just couldn’t turn her away. It would gut me.

I squashed down my emotions, becoming cold and calculating in my obedience. I could do this, I knew. I would help Bella.

I fetched my weapons, grabbed a snack, and shrugged on my checkered jacket that had once belonged to Mike but was certainly mine now.

And off I went, ignoring the gaping pit that was opening up within me. At least, I told myself, if I followed Bella I might not have to face the Thunderbird tomorrow.